Recognized or Scrutinized?

It would be hard to count how many times over the years that bank leaders have told me, "You know, most of what you talk about is relevant beyond banking."

It always makes me smile, because the idea that the practices that build effective leaders, cohesive teams, and healthy cultures would be entirely different from other businesses is amusing. 

After all, businesses are comprised of people, and whether those people work in retail, research, medicine, academia, janitorial services, or banking, we have far more in common than not.

This was on my mind recently during a conversation with a non-banker friend who is dealing with a new boss.

The issues he brought up sounded exactly like the ones bankers have shared with me so many times.

The new boss has my friend questioning his future with the company.

This friend has been one of the most reliable and productive members of his organization for many years. Yet, he tells me he now feels micromanaged and disrespected.

While chatting with him and offering empathy and advice, I was simultaneously thinking about what I would suggest to his new boss if given the opportunity. (I haven’t…and likely won’t.)

I reminded my friend that he hasn’t worked with the new boss long enough to have the kind of comfort and trust he had with the previous one.

“Micromanaging” may simply be the new boss trying to get a handle on things.

He may think constantly checking-in and questioning him on things is… well…his job.

It’s likely he’s still figuring it all out.

Sure, that’s a very generous interpretation, but we shouldn’t immediately assume ill intent or incompetence when we become frustrated.

And if a new manager’s “style” is making his job harder than necessary, he needs to respectfully hint at ways they may adapt their communication practices. 

If given the chance to speak to the new supervisor, I’d (respectfully) advise that there’s a big difference between closely monitoring people and productively leading them.

Yes, it is possible to effectively lead people without having to know and approve what they do every minute of the day. 

The difference between feeling recognized and feeling scrutinized often comes down to finding the right communication schedule, channel, and tone.

Whether you’re the manager or the one being managed, strive to remain conscious of that fact. 

Photographic Memories

While going through one of my semi-annual purges of the things that accumulate on my desk and in my office, I came across a stack of pictures I had placed in a drawer long ago.

Yes, kids, there was a time when we had to physically print photos if we wanted to look at them.

The batch of pictures I found was from around the time I first joined the banking industry. There were both work-related photos and more personal, at-home shots.

Now, I suppose one of the traits of getting older is that you’ve experienced way more things than you can keep in your mind.

Periods of time, during which all kinds of “important” things happened, apparently fall into a memory hole.

As I looked at these decades-old pictures, I found myself repeatedly thinking, “Oh wow, I totally forgot about that.”

There were a few pictures that brought back vivid memories of pressures I felt at the time. Sure, I’m often smiling in the photos, but I remember dealing with the stress associated with any number of factors back then.

What’s funny now is remembering how stressed I was about some all-consuming issues that, in hindsight, seem incredibly trivial.

I want to talk to the guy in the picture and say, “Dude…relax.” 

Now, did everything always work out just as I hoped? Absolutely not.

There are plenty of things I wish I could tell the clueless younger me in those pictures.

“Hey, don’t hire that person. Oh…and don’t waste your time chasing that client. And you really ought to spend more time talking with and learning from that person before they go.”

Stuff like that.

With a little more reflection, however, I find that most of the mistakes and setbacks almost always served a purpose.

Sure, it was hard for the rather green guy in the pictures (including a few Polaroids) to grasp those purposes at the time.

Upon even a little more reflection, I realize that if I’m lucky enough to be here another few decades, I’ll likely look back at this period the same way. Dude…relax.

Not everything works out the way you hope or plan… and that’s often a good thing.

Whether you are closer to the beginning or end of your own career journey, all you can do each day is the best you can do.

So… do that.

The right perspective may not make today’s challenges easier, but it increases our resilience when taking them on.