My wife and I were recently back home in South Louisiana for the funeral of the father of a dear friend.

Our friend’s father was a beloved figure in his community who had lived a long and purposeful life.

Events like this are understandably somber and sad, but they can also be moving and even motivating as people share stories, laughter, and fond memories of a life well lived.

As we arrived for the visitation in a nearly full church, I leaned toward my wife and said, “I’m gonna guess most of the people who were at my bachelor party are in this room.”

That random comment made her chuckle and pinch my arm. And while I was kinda trying to be funny, it was also a statement of fact.

It had been 33 years, and I hadn’t seen many of those guys since our wedding.

That had nothing to do with anyone personally. These were great guys.

It’s just that we moved not long after we married, and I simply never saw them again.

I knew a little about some of them through social media posts over the years. Some, I had lost track of entirely.

Again, nothing personal. I have no doubt some of them had forgotten I existed, as well.

Well, I was right. Seven guys from my bachelor party and wedding were there.

I had not laid eyes on five of them in just over three decades.

As I greeted each one, they began sharing funny memories from those days.

And more than one complimented my wife for apparently having the patience of Job.

Within minutes, we were talking about old times, memorable events, and old friends as if we had been meeting for weekly coffee (or other beverages with that crew) all these years.

The part of my brain that tends to detach from an experience and analyze what’s going on landed on a line I often share with bankers: “People have lives. And a life is a full-time job. They’re not thinking of you unless you give them a reason to.”

Each of these guys had changed quite a bit and yet, in small ways, not at all.

These were friends I didn’t really know anymore.

Not because anything bad had happened, but because the years had passed and I had not checked in.

How many friends or customers do you know but no longer really know?

How many relationships have simply been paused?

And what might happen if you were the one who pressed play?

An old friend I worked with many moons ago recently texted me a happy birthday wish.

Just hearing from him had me reflecting on how good he and his wife were to my wife and me when we were a young couple transplanted for my job.

Along with a career in banking, my friend was once the sales manager at a car dealership.

I found few things more enjoyable than grabbing a cup of coffee, sitting in his office, and listening to his car salesman stories from back in the day.

And while there are car dealership practices I would not recommend copying, one phenomenon my friend described has stayed with me all these years.

He often joked in his Southern drawl, “There’s nothing more dangerous than a sales guy who just sold something.”

Now, no, he wasn’t “dangerous.”

He meant that someone who had just experienced success was far more likely to find it again soon.

My friend said he could sit back and watch a salesman who had been stuck to his desk, never picked up the phone, and approached customers in the showroom “like he owed them money” become completely transformed.

He said these salesmen went from thinking they had an impossible job to realizing that the effort they put into becoming real experts on their products and the attitude they brought to customers mattered.

No, not everyone was going to buy a car from them.

And sure, some people were wasting their time.

And yes, some people still walked into the showroom assuming they were liars before the salesman even opened his mouth.

But increased effort and an improved attitude usually led to better results.

And those results led to even better results. It was a virtuous cycle.

His most productive people were never “putting one over” on anybody.

They were simply putting in the work and…get this…actually helping people confidently make one of the biggest purchasing decisions they had ever made.

My old buddy said that his job was to pat salesmen on the back and stay out of their way when they were on a roll and encourage those in a slump by reminding them that slumps don’t last.

Some days don’t go your way.

But the work you put in today and the attitude you walk in with tomorrow can turn things around.

That’s true for all of us.

What are you doing today to help yourself and your people get on a roll tomorrow?